moments
points of rapture

ephemeral, euphoric, revealatory of the total, radical, sometimes revolutionary possibilities latent in every day life.

I can remember comin' home
See you standin' at the stove
With the dishes on the table
Dinner ready to go
We'll maybe go out to a movie show
Something that you like to see

the world's a movie
strip me of my role
i wanna play
a brand new role

a new scene awaits each day
I was the queen of the alley, I could talk some trash
I was the princess of the paupers crowned downtown at the beggar's bash
I was the pimp's main prophetess I kept everything cool
Just a backstreet gambler with the luck to lose
And when the heat came down it was left on the ground
The devil appeared like Jesus through the steam in the street
Showin' me a hand I knew even the cops couldn't beat
I felt his hot breath on my neck as I dove into the heat
It's so hard to be a saint when you're just a gal out on the street

And them South Side sisters sure look pretty
The cripple on the corner cries out "Nickels for your pity"
And them downtown boys sure talk gritty

*discover streetlife

here is all the money that i owed you
so that you can go buy a new life
i hate all those people that tell you that
money is the root of lies
they have never been to a welfare christmas party
where the children's faces are like lights
shining & smiling
i would throw more wads of notes
if i had those
if i had those, so called roots of lies.

walk in a line
do not stray
do not stare
walk in a straight line

you try to scream
shout. speak.
but no one hears
not even yourself

find your echo
search deeper

Let me down gently I don't wanna feel the pain
I don't wanna learn, cant stand the burn, its driving me insane
my hardened heart is bleeding, light is shining through the crack
slowly stitch it shut, quickly heal the cut, take this burden off my back
Your busy mind is questioning the thoughts you held before
you ponder if the thoughts you had are ones that you should hold for more
asking yourself questions your mind could never comprehend
but in the back there is still that faith that you will turn to in the end

*try

i'm tired of waiting
tired of sleeping
everytime i close my eyes
i know i'm missing something
i'm tired of wondering
what i'm so fucking tired of asking
always needing and wanting something
i'm tired of thinking
tired of wondering what
i come as i am
never give a damn
come where i can

Shame - It's the game you play for fame
But give it some time you won't remember their names
So you will, so you won't
It's those one-hit wonder melodies who cannot sing a note

trevor.
Well he choked on the collar
And he clawed at the fence
And now he feels a bit taller
And it starts to make sense, starts to make sense that
There are battles worth fighting
And there are wars to be won
And it's not always exciting
Just to get the job done, to get it done
My eyes have seen
More than I thought that I could bear
And I'm not even halfway there

nicho.
Well it's good to be gifted
And you can try to be true
Would you like to be lifted?
That's up to you, that's up to you
You're under no obligation
To just keep doing what you're told
It's a simple equation
All you have is your soul, all you have is your soul

disappointing once more
disillusioned encore
steer clear of the five
fight the life
free the ties
frank's the line
franks a lie

you dont know what i mean. you dont feel what i feel. the five in life. the fire in life. the fires we brave. the lies we lied. the things we fry. the things we try. i try to be.
i should try fiver. higher. wider. deeper. fall higher. deeper. plung lower. dig further. crawl further. from the grave that speaks of the fiver. liver. travel. dimmer. dreamer.

Transport, motorways and tramlines
Starting and then stopping
Taking off and landing
waiting n laundry
The emptiest of feelings

Disappointed people clinging on to bottles
And when it comes it's so so disappointing

You know, you know where you are with
You know where you are with
Floor collapsing
Floating, bouncing back
And one day....
I am going to grow wings
A chemical reaction
Hysterical and useless
Hysterical and...

Let down and hanging around
Crushed like a bug in the ground
Let down and hanging around

disappointing
thats the word that sums up my feelings
disenchanted once more
disillusioned encore
listen as you deliver the plan
just one syllable said
from the sound of your voices
the promises we made
at least i tout we did
guess not
you were some people i believe
some people that left me
disappointed once more
disillusioned encore
tired of dreaming
at the back of my mind
now its dawning
surfacing
a disillusioned encore
disppointing once more

*sighs ** belch *** belch

First we'll climb a tree
And maybe then we'll talk
No dress rehearsal
This is our life
But that's where the hornet stung me
And I had a feverish dream
With revenge and doubt
Tonight we smoke them out

You are ahead by a century
You are ahead by a century
You are ahead by a century
So disappointing you's getting me down
So disappointing you's getting me down
So disappointing you's getting me down

A disappointment.
Oh, you shouldn't have done,
You couldn't have done,
You wouldn't have done the things you did then.

And we could've been happy.
What a piteous thing,
A hideous thing was tainted by the rest,
But it won't get any harder,
And I hope you'll find your way again.

And it won't get any higher,
And it all boils down to what you did,
then.

i feel that we are distancing
i feel that your words are coming across really harsh
they are attacking me from everywhere
i sense your hostility
i try to fight the evil thoughts
but they keep coming back to me
i tell myself its just me
but my skin says otherwise
whats wrong with the both of us?
maybe its just me. i search to find. an empty grave i found. words you dont leave any. clues i searched in vain.
you left me with the other two. the three of you are together. two add three equates 5. and it will always do cos i am omitting one out.
me.

*sob

fuck thoughts
fuck racism
fuck brains
fuck mentality
fuck double minded souls
fuck double lined papers
fuck double rider bikes
say no when you dont wanna do something
express what you wanna do from the start
disappointment sinks when you fail to.

*cognitive dissonance

wrap it in cling wrap
enclose it in a plastic bag
encircle it with band aids
trap it in a thimble
someone give me a hand. i have to get to sculpture class in 15 hours time and i have a mutilated finger thanks to the onions n the lethal weapon i have in my kitchen, they call a chopper! darn* anyway ... i m scratchin my head ... with the OTHER hand ... pondering if thats a fairly good excuse to give the class a miss! hah*

nah ... i wouldnt .. its just heaps of fun and they serve amazing food at PlayBOx. .. check it out! the waiteresses r groovy as well!

chill*

our lives begin to end the day we decide to remain silent about the things that matter!

guess i took a short sabbatical!
its been awhile but hey tat shows i have a life outside penning blogs ...

anyway :::

seeing how the world evolves and how people spend their money ( ashamed of myself as well!)
makes you think that the luxury of that gelati or salad on top of your mains (not suggeting that you give up ur greens)
but i bet you get the picture! those extras overheads that are not needs ...but are WANTS!
i bet all of us are guilty of that

i wanna give a big shoutout to you guys!
" WORLD VISION NEEDS YA!"""""

Children in Haiti face many challenges. Haiti is one of the poorest countries in its region, which has enormous impact on issues such as education, health and employment. Many children cannot attend school and less than half the population can read and write. Almost two thirds do not have access to safe drinking water. Because so many people rely on unsafe water sources, like drains, malaria is widespread and illnesses like diarrhoea claim young lives. In fact, for every 1000 children born in Haiti, around 130 die before they are five years old..plus there are many other regions in 3rd world countries that are experiencing similar dire straits ...

if you are a decent income churning bloke ... play a role in bringing hope, joy and manifest love to these poor little kids.

*peace n love

know what ? yogurts n green apple smiths taste heavenly.
extremely sensual too.

try it!
* plus ... the yogurt has to be the fruity kind! hah

over and done with my design proposals
oh ... anyone there with any thoughts on the youths ,,, in our society today?
if you smarties out there have any insights
or if you just wanna give a go in regards to a new building to house the youths
drop a tinker : 24seven@itookmyprozac.com

hmm ... just wondering what i should have logged in my blog for the day
spent the day with 2 really cool gays (or at least highly suspicious gay-lookalikes)
plus they are so nice ... all the higher chances that they arent straight
anyway ... i have nuthin against em ... and neither should you!

shame to those blokes who attacked the gays in St Kilda!

+peace!

as you can see ..
i havent been all tat hardworking in penning my blogs
bugger it! just too much work @ hand
anyhow ...
here's wishin Raelene a fantastic bashful Bday
and a belated B day to my sis!
only hav time for all tat ..ciao!

max life up!

i felt i lived life to the fullest today.
cant imagined how packed a schedule i had today.
but it felt good. great! awesome!!
to sum up what i did today:
-chill @ st kilda
-dine @ lygon
-taking pervs @ chapel
-working really hard @ parkville
-working equally hard @ prahran (only a few know bout tis! *ssshhh)
and desperately in need of more time to work even harder on my design concepts.

live life dun jus walk thru it.
*cheers!

885million people around the world speaks this language::
surprise surprise, its not english.
english is only spoken by bout 322 million of humankind.

chinese/mandarin is the most spoken language.
for those ranking craze ones ....
spanish holds second place
while english is third.

dun take things for granted:many times things arent what they seem: to be 'in' the crowd: learn mandarin.
for me .. its having to brush that up!

zai jian (seeya in the widely spoken mandarin)

what do u desire at this very moment?

is desire productive? do your desires initiate, inspire or even compel you to allow it to surface? desire is like a production, it puts you in a certain staged scene, it creates 'situations'. i find myself using desire for my material wants rather than needs. for needs, consumption is a better bet. desire is an energetic bricolaging that uses whats at hands in perverse ways: transvaluing the context, allowing the constituents to fly free and connect in diverse ways.

desire stems not from lack but from a greedy overflowing plenum of wants.

*groove

there is only one way to come into this world, but there are many to leave it. isnt this true? what music would you like to be played on your funeral day?
or you would prefer it to be a silent affair? ponder on ... email or ring me up to lemme know!

for me ... it shld be some moby number ...

think!
cheers!

i witnessed a thief at work today. i was awed. he was young. really young. bout 15 years old. he wasnt a raggedmuffin or anything like that. he was normal. but with extraordinary handicraft. which could be put to betta use. these kids are everwhere and they are making a statement which i guess we have to listen up to! thick dossiers are available in police stations on these street kids. people jus reckon that they cant do much to lend a helping hand. but i guess we could. start with the kids from 3rd world countries. pardon me ... but many of us are falling into the american way of life. and its shameful. the americans ... ( @ least most americans) are the most entertained and least informed people in the world.

what you really value is what you miss, not what you have. stock less on assets and possessions. do your bit for the kids out there!
youth is a blunder. adulthood a struggle. old age a regret.

with empathy*

Too much sanity may be madness. And maddest of all, to see life as it is and not as it should be! i am a dissent for realist.

we do have to be sensitive & pragmatic at times.

chill*

britain marks 150 years of public toilets being in use. Kudos! wished melbourne had more public toilets. its queer. everytime you see one, you dun see the need to visit it. but once you pass miles away from one. it suddenly seems like you have enough liquid in your body to sustain any desperate bloke in sahara. was prancing up and down nicholson street near princess theatre and had to take a tram down to bourke street to use the loos in myers. pathetic. but true. i wasnt all that dressed up to use the loos in the parliment house. and the ones in princess theatre.hard rock cafe. price waterhouse coopers centre. you named it all. had locked loos doors. they were only open to you if you were a) an employee b)some dressy block whose name rhymes with john howard c) if you purchased a train ticket and are gonna pass the gates to board the trains. darn! we should have more of those portable toilets stuffs. will share bout those soon.

happy public toilet day!

a surprise find in my mail box. photos of chums cuddled together in drunken euphoria. and i used to think that perth was a farmer boys haven. guess not. it seems like booze. . booze .. wines ... and booze. seems like the motley crew are havin the hell of their life down under. work's sinkin in for me. i should be doddling.. fondling .. modelling .. drawing .. but here i am crappin. but thank heavens i love my studies. i cant imagine myself working. having to listen to i-think-i-am-the-smartest-you-have-to-listen-to-me clients. not forgetting that forced plastic smile. fuck corporate life. yes, its hard to please everyone and i never endeavour or even try to please anyone. but i guess when someone has the hard cold cash and demands .. oops. .. commission you to design their house, even if it all sounds like a barble-doll house. during most circumstances you would agree. thats your rice bowl. swallow that or do away with no paid vacation, no health benefits, no health insurance,,,etc and ultimately having to gate-crash and camp in one of your mates place. argh* enough bout f**king working life. i am glad i am still a student. vacation jobs still rocks. i still smile. i still chuckle. patronise me.

peace*24seven

nicholas. if there's any one act that epitomises you, its a sprint to the loo. Your quick dashes to the loo displays every trait that makes nicholas nicholas. *Hah .. i should retreat and take a step back from poking fun @ ya .. but its just too fulfilling. wonder what have u been muchin tat is causing that much disturbance in your tummy. anyway.. you sound bad on the phone.
cant say much. might be more helpful if i didnt post your details online. anyhow ... take care chum!

stay in the loo!

I find your eye sockets to be a wondrous amusement park filled with neo-plastic pleasures and oncogenic delights.

cheers!

someone just rang my mobile. started shouting profanities,babbling incoherence. one down. one of my mates got ditched. the girl's a bitch. at least that was what he said. He was loved. He loved. She loved. She was loved. Isnt that the deal? Hate is real, it is strong and it inspires you to profane and drag one of our species to the coffin. Somehow i reckon i arent making much sense. I am trying to. But sometimes karma just pisses on us and things just go wrong. Hold breathless anticipation for the future.
love's hard to define. hate's much easier. but please have control. dun manifest hate. you are a poet.

getting laid is not love. keep that in mind.
you have the vocabulary of an aspidistra in panic.

*love

perpend: how could anyone be chromaphobic?
god is white :: pure is white :: sheeps are white :: the devil has a black outline
colours :: colores :: are they contaminants to an object :: an embellishment, an addition, a supplement :: do they relate more to 'mere appearances' rather than to the essential essence and structure of things?
ponder on. guess i have been over the top with all the colour talk recently. colours. many take them for granted but never give them due credit.
when the apple turns brown, its rotten.
when the bread turns green, its mouldy.
imagine the world without colours.
terrifying!
+groove

sometimes i wonder if we should all have eyes
that visualise objects in black and white?
any takers?
it sounds good, at least to me
no one will ostracise against the blacks
the white supremecy would be eradicted
or am i having just dreamy utopian ideas that might never surface?
before you intrigued ones out there ponder if i have been the latest victim of discrimination
I have to shout a loud NO!
if we have bio-handicapped vision
we might still visualise the world in different shades of grey wouldnt we
which brings us back to square one
i guess we just have to make up our hearts and minds
that we are nobodys to judge someone else
and colour division and discrimination is just so uncool.
thanks for keeping with this crap.
*peace

my favorite F words
fun::folies::foes::folds::friends::fried::frank::frog
fix:fax:fangs:folly:french:
fridays:
famn! friday's freakin far ...
just make everyday friday.
what are your favourite F words.
somehow i feel i left something out.

foes!

satyrs + cyborgs
Arse! I havent been able to get an internet connection from home. I have to resort to gatecrashing into other's properties to access to the 3Ws. Pathetic. Shameless. Sick. Went to the booksellers to get a textbook. I could say that I have conquered K9! I hate the start of the semester. The bookroom's always filled with throngs of book lugging students. Some intelligent bloke should suggest they operate in a more efficient manner. Oh .. if they do.. guess i would have less to whine. less to write. less to pen. might be goody good news for many. hah.
savour life!

its getting more n more chilly
jus when i tout the sun's rising
and the temperature's heating
the winds starts howling
rain starts plattering

its ironic how we much time we spend
planning what we are gonna do tomorrow
the day after
the future
some bloke commented: if you fail to plan, you plan to fail
so true
but in my case, I plan but I fail to execute the plan
the situations sometimes doesn’t allow one to
oh well, maybe I m not making sense to the majority
but to the minority
those special creatures out there
I am.

Shaved heads seems to be everywhere
moby
sinead o'connor
the singer from skunk,anansie
the pre-cog in minority
and they all look fantastic
maybe we should all shave our heads bald
oops
I hear shoutouts of rage from mr vidal
Well. That’s just my take on our crowning tresses.
No sweat mate!
Continue marketing your curlers, relaxers and enhancers.